Brain Injuries - Anger, Frustration and Bumps In The Road

When living with someone who has sustained a traumatic brain injury, there will no doubt always be some anger, frustration, irritability and bumps in the road when things don't go as expected, as wanted or take longer than anticipated. Things happen to all of us and when they do we learn, as we mature, to accept those situations that are often beyond our control. However, when someone has experienced a brain injury, there is a self-centered way of looking at a situation. Because those who have had brain injuries are often like young children again, it is hard for them to accept the fact that things don't always happen when they want them to.

This has been the case since my partner had his motorcycle accident. He became very frustrated and irritable when it took longer than he expected to get an Assessment regarding being able to drive again; while he waited for his subsequent driver's license and, when on our first family vacation after his accident - (probably as a result of being out of his comfort zone). The most recent time was when we didn't get away in our motorhome when it was hoped we would be able to leave. He eventually in frustration, set off on his own. When someone has a brain injury, anger and frustration will often lurk just below the surface when things don't go smoothly.

I have noticed with my partner that his anger is usually fueled by frustration. It can also be the result of a loss of emotional control or any perceived lack of control. For many people there is a trigger to anger and frustration. It can be a high level of noise, long line-ups, being asked to do something they are no longer capable of doing, fatigue or anything that makes them uncomfortable.

As caregivers it is up to us to try to keep things running as smoothly as possible but because we are human, this doesn't always happen. We can assist our family member by trying to encourage them to increase their self-awareness by determining the causes of their anger; have them attempt to calm down when they feel themselves becoming frustrated; practice thinking before reacting in anger and, avoid a situation that can create frustrations.

As Mark Victor Hansen said, "Things will never be perfect. There are always challenges, obstacles and less than perfect conditions."

And a quote by Bob Greene: "Setbacks are bumps in the road; they are not the end of the road."